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Worst Technology Experience EVERAugust 29th, 2005 by Hans Bjordahl :: see related comic |
The other day I had to print out an 800-page file (yow!) and rather than push my decrepit old printer over the edge into madness, I decided to print it at Kinkos. Last I checked, Kinkos had this nifty feature where you could upload a file to their Web site, they’d print it and you could just pick it up. Quick and easy. Well after that process errored out due to the size of the file, I elected to install the new “Print to Kinkos” add-in that allows users to, like the name suggests, “Print to Kinkos” directly from within an application. Cool!
So I started the installation process. And waited. And waited. Then waited some more as the process detoured to install the .NET Framework first (”Hey! You don’t mind if I bring a friend along on the install, do ya?”) Then I restarted my computer. Then the install resumed. Then I waited. And waited. In Kinkos’s defense, nowhere on their Web site did they promise that the install would be “quick.”
As I rearranged my morning schedule accordingly, it dawned on me that the promise of technology is a wonderful thing, but that’s one of the very reasons its occasional failures (or even slowdowns) are so enraging. It made me think back to other instances where technology has inspired me to new heights… of madness:
1) Real Player. If you went through a Real Player installation back in the early days of the program, you know what I’m talking about, to the point where even reading this may trigger a traumatic flashback. Little did you know on clicking “install” that you’d be embarking on a months-long battle to keep Real Player from demanding to “play” everything your computer ever attempted to run afterwards, including Excel spreadsheets and simple text files. To Real’s credit, however, more recent installations of Real Player are much more polite, to the point where the application behaves like a contrite ex-alcoholic apologizing to users for its past binges on file extensions.
2) Web site Flash intros. Speaking of confessions, I’m going to admit right here that in the heady days of the dot-com boom I sold a few of these myself. I’m sorry. In retrospect, investing in a Macromedia Flash experience to make “Who We Are” and “What We Do” spin around on some invisible axis for two minutes did little to advance the goals of your Web site. On behalf of the entire industry, I apologize, and you can take some solace in the fact that we all eventually got what we deserved.
3) Digital camera interfaces. I don’t know in what usability lab in Japan they determined that flashing 15 cryptic icons on the back of my digital camera display would ever be construed by me as “useful” information, but it’s not. I still don’t know what the flower-with-the-slash-through-it means and I’m not reading the 200-page manual to find out.
4) VCRs. You know that old joke about how hard it was to set the clock on the VCR? Why was that a joke for the ENTIRE INDUSTRIAL LIFE of that particular piece of technology? Why didn’t someone — anyone — in the electronics industry just stay late one night and fix it?
5) U.S. automakers. You’ll never guess how much the average mileage of U.S. passenger vehicles has increased since 1988. Because it DECREASED. (Source: Business Week.) Stop for a minute and think about that. In the era of skyrocketing gas prices, global warming, and epic Middle Eastern wars fought over oil supplies, U.S. automakers have actually REGRESSED in terms of fuel efficiency. This is failure on a scale that can devastate entire industries. The entire U.S. auto industry should crawl under a rock and flagellate itself. They should rename every Motown sports team “The Detroit Shame.” It’s that embarrassing.
What’s your worst technology experience ever?
Here’s one for you - trying to get DRM’d stuff to work on a new computer or another computer you’ve bought. There are so many hoops you have to jump through, and even then, it may or may not work. I’ve heard some horror stories about iTunes music that’s older than a year.
Or, another annoyance - how hard it is to replace/work on modern cars. i.e. how much electronics are in these cars, but replacing those electronics are unbelievable expensive. A car has far less number crunching power, not to mention hardware, than a standard desktop computer. Yet, a desktop computer, with more power, can be bought for 1/4 of the price of some of these car parts. I’ll grant some exclusion as it’s a car, but seriously - the ability to make a vehicle where when things go wrong, you can just swap out broken components is a GOOD idea. Having to take your new car to the vendor and spend untold amounts to replace broken parts, NOT good.
You said, that in kinko’s defense they never said it was going to be quick to install their application. But I think that the lack of messaging at all is the failure here. Clearly setting user expectations is a primary goal for designer. Letting users know the steps involved, taking responsibility for those steps, mitigating the slowness, and managing complexity are all part of our responsibility. Lastly, the big sell is that next time when you want to do this, it should be very quick indeed.
If they don’t sell you on the investment and explain it, then you might be left thinking that the next time you do this, you’ll have to go through this all over again, and the negative experience will have a detrimental brand experience added on for fun.
I find that most failures in technology, are truly failures in completing the design process.
Ok, CAFE standards did not stop people from buying the big vehicles (some foreign ones too)…
But how about allowing companies like BP to ship Alaskan oil to Asia rather than the rest of the US?
There is nothing illegal about it…but we are importing oil while exporting oil…again, it is not “our oil” rather it is the oil company’s oil, but we could restrict the exportation of said oil…hmmmmm….but that would upset big oil…they get good money for the oil going to Asia…
Why irritate Venensula (I know I spelled it wrong)…they have oil…not in the middle east…that was too hard too…so now they don’t want to sell to us…
It is not all Detroit’s fault…if people really wanted hybrid cars, they would buy them. They don’t, they want something to haul the boat, the camper, the load of stuff from HomeDepot…
dw
CAFE has done a good job of killing people due to lighter and less crash-worthy cars. This blood for oil trade engineered by the eco-freaks is the real tragedy.
CAFE Clash
A Columbine a day is too high a price for fuel efficiency.
http://www.opinionjournal.com/columnists/tbray/?id=105001723
Death by Environmentalism (see The CAFE Carnage section)
http://www.intellectualconservative.com/article3340.html
The average mileage of U.S. passenger vehicles has decreased since 1988 because PEOPLE LIKE TO BUY BIG SUVs.
Big engines. HEMIs. Spinners on the wheels. Bling-bling.
Don’t blame the auto-maker. Blame us, the consumer. Detroit is just giving us what we want.
Suggestion Kitty
JobsBlog’s cartoon images and title bar are provided by Hans Bjordahl. See more…
I would add all those websites that gave me the following nightmare: you spend ages filling in info onto their form, and when you hit “Go” you are told “Communication Failure. Please try again” (of course, the politeness of ‘please’ is optional). When you hit the “Back” button the form is reset, neat and clean for you. Aaarghh…
-Arshad Tanveer
http://atanveer.blogspot.com
One I can think of:
Back in the early days of DirectX it would have a nasty habit of cannibalizing itself then not have any ability to simply reinstall. No you had to manually go in and delete within the registry as well as the physical files. The reinstall DirectX and all was better…save the numerous hours of my life I will never get back due to wonky programming …
Here’s a new one, one that may well be the worst of all in terms of acute frustration:
My ESPN Fantasy Football league “live draft” froze this Sunday.
It’s just a game you say? Oh, fantasy football isn’t “just a game.” It’s an obsession. I mean, for some of my friends. I of course keep it all in perspective. 
But when you get nine of your busy friends together for a hard-won free hour on a Sunday to participate in a live draft that you’ve been smack-talking about for weeks via e-mail, and then the damn server FREEZES (a hard freeze, lasting several hours) after the first pick, well that’s pretty damn frustrating. The workaround is to create a whole new league, schedule a whole new draft date, and prompt all your friends to join, a second time.
Which we’re doing. With another provider. This is the second ESPN fantasy football live draft I’ve had crash on me. Once is an anomaly. Twice is a trend. The worst part about the whole experience each time? A total lack of responsiveness and timely support from customer service.
The moral of the story: If you’re going to develop a technology-driven experience, test it with more than 12 simultaneous users before rolling it out to the public. And if something goes wrong that costs your users time, effort and frustration, at least pretend to care.
I think you might not have bought a decent VCR recently, because my VCR clock sets itself, and I bought it before I bought my first DVD player (and long before TiVO existed).
I used to think it was magical space rays, but I have since learned that the time is actually encoded in the signal on certain channels.
I have only set the clock on my current VCR once, when I first bought it, because I did not know it could set itself.
As for setting the recording timer, the on-screen menus make setting it pretty easy. Or my TV can control my VCR with an IR transmitter and set it to record out of its built-in guide, which also comes from magical space rays. And I KNOW the channel lineup isn’t broadcast with the cable signal–it’s quite amazing, really, if not scary for the possible privacy issues.
On a similar note: What I DON’T get is why my GameCube can remember its time setting when unplugged for months at a time, but an X-Box asks you to enter the time after being unplugged for a few minutes. This is despite the fact that an X-Box is more or less a PC, most of which have no trouble keeping time while unplugged.
My newest pet peeve is the modern, easy to use, multi function, printer-fax-copier machines. Since when should I need to check my color cartridge before I send a fax or print black and white text? And why can’t I copy if I have a modem problem? Why does a it tell me on the computer screen I just put something in to copy? Over active software solving problems I don’t have and giving me information I don’t need or already have. AAAAAAAArg!
IBM, care to explain why you took over 43 days to repair my THINKPAD 1452??
In the beginning, May of 1999.
A tale of woe
I went out money in hand, had a plan.
A new IBM computer, man.
Had my eye on the latest one yet.
IBM ThinkPad 1452 with a DVD set.
Searched, high, low, to & fro,
Sales people quoted “1452, not one I know”.
With patience and panache, I truly explained.
Check the Internet IBM’s the name.
Quite right you are sir.
The Problem is it’ll never get here.
On the IBM site look and behold.
But never in Canada will it be sold.
Heartbroken, I stammered, started, & flustered
But empty lap I departed.
Six weeks later just for a laugh.
Hell, I still had the cash
That’s a wonder to be told.
Checked all the latest, the computer greatest
They’re in the stash 1452 IBM for me to hold
With Happy JOY-joy (thanks REN&STIMPY) & much bliss
I said, ” I’ll take this”
July o2 1999 without much fuss, & extra memory and such
Took my new IBM ThinkPad 1452 home in a rush
Out of the Box in a jiff, to be set up with peripherals and such.
Monitor, printer, & scanner.
Even had room for a digital CAMMERa (sorry)
Plugged in this & that, worked, installed however asked, not a worry.
Thought all was working, I was in my GLORY
Now comes the sad part of my story.
1
The USB on the back sheared clean off, built of plastic
Wasn’t that fantastic
All that time shot
Loading in all that I got.
Programs, bits
And more than just a few pieces.
Banished, back to the box, from whence it came.
I Thought, this is not a game.
Out the door in a huff!
I spent a fortune. What’s the problem with this IBM stuff?
At the store apologies all-round.
Not our fault. A defect, the first they found.
We will fix it in but a minute, they willingly offer
I don’t think so. I’d rather another
“PARDON”
You will give me a new one, a true, BIG BLUE (IBM) one.
Done.
2
Celeron processor, sold as fast.
But only with more memory, could it pass.
So, up I went,
Money again spent.
IBM sticks from 128 to 256 K
No generic RAM for me.
That should do it, I thought truthfully.
All I got was longer waiting, stand- by to resume (sorry)
3
I learned to cope, time came to pass.
It’s an IBM ThinkPad 1452, alas.
The warranty will stand by me,
Not a worry, extended years times three.
4
DVD player, Wow movies what fun
Blue dots across the screen.
No mater what movie I’d run.
So again I started on the Internet scene
IBM was needed to be seen. ThinkPad 1452, they wanted my machine
Conflicts to be found.
Could they, soon turn it around.
All to follow is from the service work orders .At an ‘AUTHORIZED IBM SERVICE DEALER ‘ start to finish.
Unit delivered 06,19.00. For service.
June 19 2000 11:08 ERINP : When running the CD rom drive there are blue dots across the screen customer reinstalled drivers and problems remain.
June 21 2000 10:39 TOMR: I just spoke to IBM again and they suggested to easy serve this machine, because they are not sure of what the problem is.
June 23 2000 12:53 TOMR: I just spoke to IBM and they are now telling me that this machine is out of warranty unless they see proof of purchase, I called then customer (that would be me) and left them a message
June 26 2000 09:08 TOMR: will be sending the machine to IBM for repair.
June 26 2000 12:51 KEITHM: Client said the POP is in the bag with the laptop.
June 26 2000 14:49 ERINP: laptop and POP sent in.
7 days have passed
W/B 1734-594-2498 (during this time I repeatedly contacted service to enquire as to the status of my ThinkPad I got the standard answer it’s at the main depot.)
17 more days total 24.
July 13 2000 08:59 TOMR: I just spoke to IBM and they said that the laptop is fixed and we should receive it within two days
July 13 2000 09:01 TOMR: I called and updated the customer
July 13 2000 09:47 ERINP: Laptop is here Replaced LCD and SYSTEM BOARD Tech to test.
July 13 2000 10:54 TOMR: I tested the machine and EVERYTHING is working fine. This call is complete NO CHARGE
After many days lost. The call finally came
I was back in the game.
Picked IBM 1452 ThinkPad, up in a Flurry, no time to worry
Hope I won’t need to see them again in a hurry.
Home I got
Down to the office in a shot.
All my DATA was still there.
So I didn’t care.
5
Plugged all back in felt a great grin.
Till I tried to DIAL’ IN.
THE VERY NEXT DAY
What can I say?
, Back again, YES WAY!
July 14 2000 12:56 Gerards: Customer was having modem problems when he received the unit back from IBM We ran a complete recovery and the unit still locks up when using the modem (phone dialer and HyperTerminal). I called IBM tech support and we checked for any updates and ran tests There were no updates and but the modem tests passed. The tech recommended ordering a new modem Case#2369735,Fru#10L129
Customer left adapter and recovery disks
July 14 2000 14:50 Gerards: The extended warrantee expired July 10 2000 .I called IBM tech support and they will have a customer care rep call me in 1 or 2 day’s to let me know if they will replace the modem under warranty The modem was working properly before it was sent to IBM for service.
July 17 2000 15:57 Gerards: I called the customer and left a message to update him on this call.
July 18 2000 11:32 Gerards: I called IBM for an update since I have not heard from them. They said I would an answer re: warranty resolution by the end of the day.
July 18 2000 11:54 Gerards: Since the case (No not the computer case the repair file case) was opened by Mr. Napier (that would be me) they are contacting him regarding the problem
July 21 2000 12:21 Gerards: I have been contacted by Arthur yen CCT. (1-800-426-49680) From IBM and he has authorized EASY SERVE repair of the unit they are sending a shipping box.
July 24 2000 12:24 Gerards: Box has been received and the unit has been sent IBM ES32990
Time passed, 11 days Elapsed. Before it was sent to IBM for repair.
Total now 35
At this point I have begun to despair
No excuses IBM customer care.
A new THINKPAD that’s what I Demanded.
Almost a heretic I was branded.
August 01 2000 09:24 Erinp: Unit returned REPLACED SYSTEM BOARD Tech to test.
I digress, I guess
Funny, went in for MODEM came out with another new system board. Wait a minute didn’t they just do that to it.
‘ SEE way, way, above ‘
August 01 2000 09:48 Gerards: Tested unit by dialing my cell phone. All ok Customers called for pick up
Call is complete no charges applied.
Count and be dismayed
8 more days. Am I being played?
Total repair took 43 days.
IBM
It would be nice if you came up with an explanation,
To be left dangling is such frustration.
To tell the truth, I deserve some
Compensation.
End.
Cheers
I take full responsibility for the above epistle.
I consider this my verbal Missile.
IBM answer, don’t just whistle.
Aug./09/2000
Here we go again
home
My machine for building my website (honestjuans.com) would be my biggest- then my Cutlass supreme.
See, I decided that before I moved, I’d buy the computer that I would run my business on. At this time, I had enough money that I decided I’d take my current gaming machine, use it as a business machine, and buy a new gaming machine! I invested in a Dell 8400 with a 256 vid card, 3.4 ghz processor, 1 gig of virtual memory, etc., etc., a very potent hardware combo. I paid about 200 extra for express shipping. When it got here, something was very, very wrong with it. Whenever a sound was played, it came out garbled. Checking connections, testing speakers, optic drives to see if it was a CD issue, etc., and then just called tech support. The second operator I talked to suggested that I was making things up as I went. After a while, it was decided that I needed to install new drivers. Did it, still happened. Moved, and once I had time I chatted with tech support more. Average wait time was about 2 hours before I got to talk to someone, and they always went back to the “well, let us see…” Eventually, the decided it must be a hardware issue. A tech came out and replaced the harddrive and motherboard. Still happened. We checked the RAM. It was still happening. Eventually, I asked for a brand new machine. They accepted my new address in the system. I get the new machine, and they arrange to pick up the old one. After two weeks I call them because they haven’t picked up my old one. They arrange a new pickup. Two days later, I get a nasty letter saying that I need to return my computer. I call them back. Another week goes by. Finally, someone realises that they are trying to pick up the computer at my old address (despite the fact that everything else was coming to my new one). FINALLY a delivery man comes to pick up my computer- I practically knocked him over throwing the machine at him. Now, though, the new machine is plagued by software issues. It runs like crap- but its at least running and honestjuans.com is FINALLY up. I’m not going to buy computers anymore. I’ve built one of the six that I’ve owned, and it’s number two on the list of most satisfying.
Your number 5 point is total BS. Vehicles such as the Grand Am are doing better than previous versions. Currently they rival the Civic and other ‘reliable cars’. http://autos.msn.com/research/vip/Reliability.aspx?year=2005&make=Pontiac&model=Grand%20Am&trimid=-1
The reason mileage on vehicles is decreasing is that the average American gets a new car every 3 to 4 years, whereas you used to get one every 5-6 years. Less time = less miles.
Reliability, for the most part, is only percieved anyways. I have a 84 honda prelude, it barely starts, and has a problem with the brakes. I have a 87 oldsmobile, it barely starts, and has a problem with the engine. Which is more reliable?
As far as mileage is concerned, building vehicles like the Humvee, escalade, and suburban for non-commercial/civilian use is ridiculus. 99% of people who buy those guzzlers don’t need them. They would be better served by a 4 door sedan with a V-6, and they can waste money upgrading the rims, not wasting gas. Overall, simply because the technology in the engine is better, economy is up. But the way that people drive, and the types of vehicles they purchase, economy is down. It’s time to go out buy an SUV for most people.
Randy, please don’t remind me of the suckiness of the software that’s bundled with scanners. I don’t want crappy OCR and hundreds of images in proprietary formats in unsuspected corners of the hard drive, I just want to scan in documents and photos and crop the background!
Oh no, too late!
Installing IE7. Well specifically being able to keep IE6 for testing purposes proved more difficult than it should have.
At current I can’t update Windows at home because when I do I get a blue screen at startup. Thank goodness for system restore. But then again I really only need system restore because windows blows.
Yahoo installed on everything-This just pisses me off. I don’t want the f-ing yahoo toolbar, stop including it everytime I update a MS product!
Setting up VS2005 at work was the chore from hell. Nothing has made me hate Microsoft more than working in a .Net development environment.
For me Quicktime is the new RealPlayer: it behaves nearly as ugly as the original realplayer, putting icons everywhere.
Even worse is bluetooth. Every Bluetooth device I owned so far brought a load of useless blue ‘B’ to my computer. Everywhere an icon ‘do it via bluetooth’.
Want to send a file? Do it with bluetooth. Send a mail? Use bluetooth. Format your harddisk to get rid of this blue B? do it with bluetooth.
For some drivers it was not even possible to delete the useless bluetooth icon from the desktop.
I keep my systems clean. very clean. I run as user so I wont install some crap from a cd or dvd by accident, I don’t run or install funny little gadgets and stuff, I just install updates and what I really want, and I am very cautious not to get anything else. Therefore I never had stuff like any toolbar on my comp. And I wipe my harddisk at least once a year and reinstall the stuff I need using the most recent versions.
Computer problems? It was either The Inquirer or The Register that had figured out how to solve all the problems of incompatability between different companies and their DRM plans. Honest to God, they (Not me) said that what they had found that was downloading music, but especially movies was nearly the only way to get a copy that would play right. I think they called their plan, “Just Steal It.” Well hopefully this HDMI cable is going to work ‘universally’, but Blueray already has a competitor, and… all this gives me a migraine and I haven’t watched TV in twenty years, and I just let Comcast cut my cable because computers are leterally and figurativly a nightmare - AND there are evil people out there actively working to steal your identity, empty your bank account, or just plain ruin your equipment. It’s taken me years to admit I have yet another addiction… and at least for me, each and every addiction that I ever had came from my best thinking - but yielded only heartbreak. Those Amish folk aren’t as crazy as they seem. It’s 2007, the rat race is in full swing, we as a country are fat as the finest pigs, and so out of shape that a 45 year old neighbor had a heart attack and died the first time he cut his lawn this year. It’s true; credit cards are the work of the devil, and computers are tangible evidence of evil. The machines are winning the war.
Bug Bash is a comic strip written and illustrated by Hans Bjordahl. Bug Bash is a comic strip about technology: managing technology, the business of technology. It's about project management and managing projects through the dull world of Rational Rose, use cases, and requirements. Functional requirements, user requirement, functional specifications, design specifications, call it what you want but it's still the bane of project managers. And when you're done with that, you can think about all the fun that comes with timelines, scheduling, estimates (PERT estimation anyone?) and resourcing until Gantt charts are coming out of your ears. Let's not forget the risk management in the software engineering life cycle. Maintaining the project is just as much fun, managing what was initially set out in requirements and trying to keep feature creep / scope creep in check with change management. If any of these words send nightmares to you, the project manager, then this site probably rings true with you. (Who Links Here?)